First of all thank you so much for taking the time to comment and so thoroughly at that. I am thankful that you took the time doing so and I have to say that as I was reading your comment I agreed with a lot of the parts.
When I was writing this I didn't aim for originality (I didn't want the typical rich guy falls for prostitute but I did want to keep some of the main points the same.) In my writing, (the ones I do everyday and not fanfiction) I tend to lean towards emotions. I write short stories and that always works well there because there is not much going on in a short story. I do see your point as to why this is a problem here and I appreciate that you pointed it out because I hadn't noticed.
The character development was a bit rushed I admit to that. I did want it to be longer and would have liked to have touched on that more, but things got in the way (every day life, mother, college).
I do want to say that I am thankful for the comment because it does what a comment in supposed to do. It points out what could be better and I thank you again for that. This is something I will take into account for the next story. Thank you again and I am glad that you enjoyed the story.
I wish you a good day too and thank you for reading and commenting.
no subject
When I was writing this I didn't aim for originality (I didn't want the typical rich guy falls for prostitute but I did want to keep some of the main points the same.) In my writing, (the ones I do everyday and not fanfiction) I tend to lean towards emotions. I write short stories and that always works well there because there is not much going on in a short story. I do see your point as to why this is a problem here and I appreciate that you pointed it out because I hadn't noticed.
The character development was a bit rushed I admit to that. I did want it to be longer and would have liked to have touched on that more, but things got in the way (every day life, mother, college).
I do want to say that I am thankful for the comment because it does what a comment in supposed to do. It points out what could be better and I thank you again for that. This is something I will take into account for the next story. Thank you again and I am glad that you enjoyed the story.
I wish you a good day too and thank you for reading and commenting.