static_abyss: (Hanchul)
static_abyss ([personal profile] static_abyss) wrote2010-11-08 12:08 am

Things Happen II 5/11

A/N: I seriously hope no one reads the tags before they come in here to read the fic otherwise I would be so dead. *protects Hannie and Sungmin* That is as much warning as you guys are getting and maybe you'll understand and I won't need to protect them and if that's the case then...*protects Siwon* He's innocent here. lol so guys thank you so much for the comments. Babies I love you all and I was very flattered that I got such strong reactions for the last chapter. That means I am doing a good job and I love you all for the support and here is the next chapter.

Sungmin was rocking him gently. Hankyung’s head was resting on his shoulder. He wanted comfort, needed it in a way that scared him. When Sungmin moved he made a strangled noise and pulled him back down.

“It’s okay.” Sungmin whispered. “I’m not going anywhere. I just need to get you something hot to drink. Wait, here. I’m just going to the kitchen.”

Hankyung let him go. His eyes stared at nothing as he heard Sungmin move things in the kitchen. He didn’t know what to do. He had thought about his and Heechul’s future a lot lately. He had imagined that something like this would happen eventually seeing how his father was. But, he had always expected, always assumed that it would be a woman who stole Heechul away from him. He thought he would have to compete with a model one day and really there was no competition there.

He had never expected this. He had never expected another man. How was he supposed to compete with that?

“Here.” Sungmin said handing him a cup of coffee.

Hankyung breathed in the smell. He took a drink and it was perfect.

“Thank you.” He said.

Sungmin had never left him. Sungmin knew him so well, knew him better in some ways than Heechul did. Heechul had never bothered to learn about Hankyung’s obsession with coffee. Heechul didn’t know how to convince Hankyung to wear the strangest clothes. Heechul took no interest in that. Sungmin did. Sungmin forced him out of his comfort zone. Sungmin offered that shoulder he so very much needed.

“Sungmin.” He whispered taking the younger man into his arms.

Hankyung closed his eyes and breathed in the unfamiliar scent. He smelled strawberries and warmth. He leaned forward and pressed his face against Sungmin’s neck.

“H…Hankyung.”

He heard the tremor in Sungmin’s voice and it was nice.

“Sungmin.” He breathed. “Sungmin, I need you.”

“Hankyung.” Sungmin said trying to move away. “You don’t want to do this.”

Hankyung looked up into Sungmin’s eyes. He did want this. He wanted it so badly. He needed it. He needed Sungmin. He needed a way out, some release.

“Sungmin, I need you, please.”

He didn’t know exactly why he said it. He just knew that there was Sungmin, Sungmin who had never once denied him anything, Sungmin who offered him comfort, Sungmin who had once wanted him, Sungmin who would never leave. It was confusion more than anything that drove him forward.

Sungmin or Heechul? Heechul who’s laugh made him breathless. Heechul who’s smile meant the world to him, Heechul who could hurt him so very easily, Heechul who knew what to say to make him hurt, Heechul who sometimes took things too far.

Or Sungmin. Sungmin who’s laugh was addictive. Sungmin who’s smile brought out his own, Sungmin who would never hurt him, Sungmin who knew how to make the pain go away, Sungmin who never let things get out of hand.

“Sungmin.” He whispered, still trying to figure out what he wanted.

“Hankyung, think for a second.” Sungmin pleaded. “Heechul. You love Heechul.”

He loved Heechul? He loved Heechul. But, Heechul was with someone else now, someone who seemed very attached, someone who liked him, someone who Heechul hadn’t minded holding hands with. Heechul never held hands with anyone, except Hankyung. He would hang off of people’s arms, but he never held hands that way with them. That was for the two of them, their own way of recognizing each other, their only form of intimacy in front of the rest of the world.

He loved Heechul, but Heechul had thrown everything away with that one word. Fiancé. What the hell? Even if Heechul loved him, no, even though Heechul loved him, he couldn’t let it go. He couldn’t erase that smirk, that glow in his eyes, that wink. What had Heechul been trying to tell him? A joke?

If it was a joke, it was a cruel one. He hadn’t seen Heechul in so long, way too long. How could he come back and with a joke like that no less? Hankyung didn’t understand, not even Heechul could be that cold. Hadn’t he missed him at all? Or had he known that he would come back, that it would only be matter of time before he saw Hankyung again.

But, Hankyung hadn’t known. Hankyung had sat through sleepless nights, returning nightmares, helpless thoughts. Hankyung had wished everyone away, had practically thrown everything away, with just the thought that he might never see Heechul again. Didn’t that mean something? Didn’t that count for something? He had waited so long and now Heechul was doing this.

“Sungmin. Please. Make it go away.” He whispered his voice a hoarse plea.

“Hankyung.” Sungmin said taking his face in his hands. “Hankyung, if I knew how to make it go away, believe me, I would. I don’t like seeing you like this, but you have to know that what you were going to do is not that way. You have to—“

But, Hankyung didn’t care anymore. He had made his decision, or more precisely, this moment had made the decision for him. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Sungmin. He felt the protests, heard the words, but he couldn’t be denied, didn’t want to be denied. He was drowning and this was the fastest way to get free, to save himself.

He eased the last of Sungmin’s restraint by pressing his lips to the other man’s neck. He bit down and felt the breath come out of Sungmin in a gasp. He moved the coffee cup away and leaned back into the couch pulling Sungmin fully onto his lap. He kissed him wishing with all his heart that the pain would go away.

“Hankyung.” Sungmin spoke into this mouth. “Stop.”

But, he didn’t stop. He stood up and carried Sungmin with him. What was he doing? He threw Sungmin down on the bed. Did he really want this? He moved forward.

“Heechul.”

He froze, his heart wrenching painfully at the name. Heechul. Heechul. Heechul.

“You can’t do it.” Sungmin said pushing him away.

Heechul. Heechul with his hand in Siwon’s. Heechul with his mocking smile. Heechul with his hands in Hankyung’s hair, lost to the world. Heechul whispering sweet words. Heechul leaving him. Heechul denying his phone calls. Heechul showering him with gifts. Heechul winking. Heechul smirking. Heechul and Siwon.

Siwon.

Heechul and Siwon.

He leaned forward, no longer caring. His lips fought Sungmin, his hands holding him down. He wanted to hear his name come out of those lips, wanted to see if Sungmin really did taste like strawberry, wanted to know what it would feel like to make Heechul hurt. He wanted it more than anything.

He heard Sungmin vaguely, but could only concentrate on one thing: Heechul. This was for Heechul, to show Heechul that he didn’t depend on him, didn’t need him, wasn’t going to wait forever, that he had people who loved him too, that he could make it hurt if he wanted to, that Siwon or no Siwon, Hankyung was the one in charge, that he would make it even, that he didn’t care.

But, he did. He did care. He cared more than anything. He cared that Heechul had been gone so long. He cared that Siwon had been holding his hand. He cared that he had never once gotten to hug Heechul, not in public. He cared that he was now forcing himself on Sungmin who’s eyes were round and who was in love with Kyuhyun.

He groaned and rolled away. Sungmin didn’t look too happy.

“What the fuck Hankyung? What the hell were you going to do?”

“I don’t know, Min. I don’t know.”
                        ***
“What are we going to do?” Sungmin asked sometime later.

Hankyung’s head was on Sungmin’s lap as they sat on the couch. He closed his eyes and leaned into Sungmin. He wanted the warmth.

“What do you want me to do?” Hankyung asked.

“You could always take me out for dinner.” Sungmin laughed attempting a joke.

“We never talk about this again?” Hankyung asked.

“Never talk about this again.” Sungmin said getting up.

“Don’t go yet.” Hankyung said.

Sungmin smiled. He turned around and pulled Hankyung against him. Hankyung closed his eyes as Sungmin placed a kiss on his forehead.

“Are you better?”

“Yeah.” Hankyung answered.

“Okay, I’m going to go now.”

Hankyung nodded. He watched Sungmin smile and wave and watched him leave. He threw himself down on his bed wondering what exactly he had just done and with who. Sungmin was practically in love Kyuhyun and he liked Kyuhyun.

What had he done?

He rolled out of bed and picked up the things he had thrown on the floor. He dropped them in the basket and went to shower. He stood under the scalding water wanting to wash out everything, not Sungmin, just everything else.

“What the fuck did I do?” he asked himself as he stepped into clean pants.

He walked out drying his hair on his towel.

“You need to stop that. You look so hot with that water all over.”

Hankyung froze mid wipe. He looked up at Heechul who was leaning against his bed. Hankyung threw a quick glance at the sheets and wondered why Heechul hadn’t said anything about them yet, as if the sheets would tell Heechul that he’d been making out with Sungmin there moments before. He dropped his towel and other clothes on top of the sheets consciously aware of how Heechul’s eyes never left him.

“What do you want?” he asked.

“Why did you run away from me?”

Hankyung raised an eyebrow. “Was I supposed to stay? After that show you put on? After you paraded your fiancé in front of me? I’m not that strong Heechul.”

Hankyung turned. He folded his arms around himself and willed Heechul out the door.

“Don’t be stupid.” Heechul said wrapping his arms around Hankyung. “I want you.”

“You want me?” Hankyung asked. “Siwon?”

“I want you stupid.” Heechul said. “Siwon is a friend. He’s helping me with something. I left because my father wanted me to find someone to marry. He paraded girls in front of me and I decided to mess with his freaking mind. I’m not really engaged to Siwon. He’s too tall for my taste.”

“I’m tall.” Hankyung said not sure why he was smiling so much.

“But, I like you. You have the best legs in the world. I love them.”

Hankyung turned around. He took Heechul’s face in his hands. He loved those dark eyes and the way they smiled up at him.

“You love me?”

“Shut up.” Heechul snapped. “I hate you.”

“No,” Hankyung said. “Not yet. It’s too soon.”

He leaned his head on top of Heechul’s. He didn’t want to think. He had Heechul again. What more could he want now?

“Hankyung.” Heechul breathed against his ear. “Hankyung, I missed you, missed you so much.”

Hankyung didn’t ask for permission. He took Heechul’s face in his hands and kissed him. He had missed it, missed it too much. He felt Heechul’s hands in his hair, but lost track of them after a while. He was focused solely on Heechul’s lips, his warm breath.

“Heechul.” He said gasping as he found out where exactly Heechul’s hands were. “Wait.”

But, Heechul didn’t listen. He was silenced by firm lips.

“Hankyung, I need you.”

Hankyung muttered his protests into Heechul’s lips. It wasn’t that he didn’t want Heechul, he thought as Heechul pulled him towards the bed. It was the damn bed and what he had been doing on it just minutes before.

“Heechul, wait.” He said pulling away.

“What?” Heechul answered slipping his hands over Hankyung’s bare chest.

Hankyung allowed himself one strangled breath. He leaned his head against Heechul and moved to run his own hands over the other man. He heard Heechul’s delicious moan in his ear and he almost forgot why he had been so hesitant. Almost.

“Hankyung.”

Heechul’s moan was too familiar. Hankyung moved his hands away. He pushed off Heechul and ran into the bathroom. He closed the door behind him and sank down to the floor, his back against the wall. He tried to remember how to breathe and couldn’t.

“Hankyung! Hankyung, open the damn door. What the hell are you doing?” Heechul yelled pounding on the door. “I haven’t seen you in weeks. Get out here now.”

“I can’t.” Hankyung called back desperate. “I can’t Heechul. Sungmin.”

“Sungmin? What does Sungmin have to do with this?”

Hankyung wrapped his arms around his legs. He buried his face in his knees and tried not to cry. He hated himself. It was official. If he ever doubted how worthless he was, he was proving it to himself now. What had he done to Sungmin?

“I…We…Sungmin.” Hankyung said.

He waited. He knew Heechul understood. There was no way Heechul didn’t understand. He heard nothing, not one sound as the minutes dragged on and on.

“You and Sungmin did what exactly? You slept with him?”

“NO! Oh God, no. No!” Hankyung said his eyes going wide.

“Open the door.”

“It’s unlocked.” Hankyung whispered.

He felt the door open and he fell back. He was looking upside down at Heechul who kneeled down to look at him. They looked at each other and Hankyung could see the hurt in Heechul’s eyes. He reached up to touch that face, to do something to erase that look, but Heechul shoved his hand away.

Hankyung watched him as Heechul’s hands cupped his face. They looked at each other as Heechul brought his lips over Hankyung’s. The kiss was slow, soft, searching. It was asking a question, whispering an answer, sealing something. Hankyung didn’t know what it was. He didn’t care. He reached up to touch Heechul’s hair, the hair he was so obsessed with. He let his hand fall softly and waited as Heechul pulled away.

“Get up.”

He did what he was told. He stood and looked at Heechul. He didn’t know what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t the hug that Heechul gave him. It wasn’t a normal hug. It was scared. It was trying to figure out something.

“Come to bed.” Heechul whispered. “I need you to hold me tonight.”

“But, what about Sungmin?” Hankyung asked confused.

“What about him? What do you want me to do? Do you want me to go kill that…” Heechul took a deep breath. “Do you want me to go do what I want to do? Do you want me to make it even for you? Should I go to Siwon or Kyuhyun?”

“No.”

“Then, just shut up and make me forget. Hold me and tell me that you love me, not him. Tell me that you were stupid, so very stupid and that you wish you could erase it all.”

“I love you.” Hankyung said immediately. “I love you so much Heechul. I was stupid, so stupid and hurt and confused. I missed you so much. And then you had to tell me that you were engaged? I’m so sorry.”

He heard Heechul sigh into his neck. “I need to sleep.”

Hankyung said nothing. He pulled Heechul onto the bed and wrapped his arms tightly, protectively around him.

“Hankyung?”

“Hm?”

“I’m going to kill you tomorrow.”

A/N: So? Uh...I seriously have no explanation for what happened. And uh, more Hanchul fluff in the next chapter. So's my bbs what did you guys think?

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