static_abyss (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
static_abyss) wrote2011-04-25 11:50 pm
static_abyss) wrote2011-04-25 11:50 pm
It Should Have Happened This Way
Title: It should have happened this way.
Pairing: shihan and side qmi. also smugbestfriend!heechul because if there is no hanchul i didn't do my job.
Genre: romance, maybe angst idk
Rating: PG-13 (maybe R)
Summary: Han Geng likes Siwon. Heechul? Heechul is just there to make fun of him.
a/n: this is sort of a different style than what I am used to writing, but meh there's a first time for everything. enjoy.
Siwon shouldn’t have touched him. That’s what Han Geng thinks anyway. He knows that this is how things start, with small touches that give way to burning gazes and rough exchanges between sheets once everyone else is sleeping. Han Geng knows because he’s had that with Heechul. He knows that is can go wrong too. It can go very wrong, if you don’t know what you’re doing, if you’re not careful.
He and Heechul have always had a unique sort of relationship, one that needs no words because sometimes words are too much. Heechul is content with just teasing Han Geng, understanding him in a way that no one else seems to understand him. They’re special; two best friends who can fuck and not have it interfere with their relationship.
Siwon is different.
Han Geng knows Siwon is different because when he first meets Siwon it’s easy.
“nǐ hǎo ma.”
Han Geng doesn’t know what to do. The words are perfect. He’s missed them after being in Korea for so long. He’s so excited to have met someone who can speak his native tongue that he’s off rambling about the weather, the sun, the sky, dancing and the way Heechul can’t seem to keep quiet long enough once he gets in one of his moods.
Siwon looks at him with big eyes, hands moving in front of him, trying to stop him. But, Han Geng is at home for once and Siwon has to take both his hands before Han Geng stops talking.
“I’m sorry.” Siwon says, his smile sheepish. “I can’t understand when you talk so fast.”
“Oh,” Han Geng says. “I’m sorry. I thought…”
Han Geng is sure that Siwon notices his disappointment. It’s kind of hard not to, but Geng has learned to deal with disappointment. He’s in Korea. This is not China.
Still, the touching. Siwon really didn’t have to touch him. He could have just told Han Geng to stop. It’s not that Han Geng minds, not really. He’s used to touching, courtesy of Heechul, but Siwon is just so eager, so willing to please. Small touches are one thing, but Siwon doesn’t do small.
On stage, off stage, before a show, after a show, everywhere; that is what Siwon does. And it’s not just a small brush of arms either. Siwon loves hugs. And Han Geng isn’t too opposed to giving them. He’s lost count of the number of times he’s run into Siwon’s arms on stage.
It’s occurred to him that maybe it was all part of this thing called fan service, but then there are the touches no one sees. There are the times that Siwon has curled up on the couch, his head on Geng’s shoulder. There are the times that Siwon has held his hand as they watch TV. There are the times that the cameras aren’t rolling and Siwon will just turn to him, eyes bright, arms ready.
Han Geng has yet to deny Siwon anything. He can say no to Heechul, but he can’t seem to say no to Siwon. It’s too easy to fall into that spot that Siwon has reserved for him. Nice and comfortable. Perfect.
No, Han Geng thinks, Siwon really should have never touched him.
---
It’s too easy to fall into a set pattern with Siwon.
“Talk to me in Korean hyung.” Siwon says one evening. “I’ll talk to you in Chinese.”
Han Geng lets him, listens as Siwon lets the Chinese words slip from his mouth. It’s beautiful and easy and Han Geng wants to answer him, but they’re practicing and he has to answer in Korean. They talk that way for days, both over the phone and when Siwon comes over. It drives the others insane because mostly they just get to hear what Han Geng is saying and with his accent, it’s kind of hard to understand sometimes.
Han Geng does it on purpose. He doesn’t want them to know what he and Siwon are talking about. He wants those words coming out of Siwon’s mouth to be only for him. It doesn’t matter that those words are nothing more than simple “did you eat yet,” “are you hungry,” or “how is my Chinese hyung.” They mean so much more to Han Geng.
He thinks it’s because Siwon is the first person to touch him in that way. Siwon is the first one to understand just how hard it is for him to be here. Siwon gets it because Siwon went to China with him that one time. Siwon came over to his room at night and sat with him. Siwon cried into Han Geng’s arms because he was homesick.
So, Siwon understands. Siwon gets it more than anyone else does and Han Geng thinks that’s why it’s so easy to fall into routine. It’s easy because Siwon has told him.
”I will protect you hyung. Just come to me. I will take care of you.”
Words like those aren’t easy to forget. Han Geng has them engraved in his head and that’s why he doesn’t want the others to know what he and Siwon talk about. He is just making sure that if Siwon ever says them again, it’ll be just between the two of them.
It’s just because Siwon gets him in a different way.
That’s all.
---
It’s Heechul’s fault Han Geng ends up with a cruel dose of reality. He thinks that he may need to get a better friend, but then, Heechul isn’t a bad friend. No, Heechul is just a bit cruel. Or maybe Han Geng just thinks that reality is cruel and finds it easier to blame Heechul.
He’ll go with the last one. He might have to revise later, but seeing as how Heechul has him pinned to the wall, it’s kind of hard to process thoughts.
“You like him you idiot.” Heechul says.
“Aren’t you supposed to be the one against the wall?” Han Geng asks.
Somewhere in the back of his mind it registers that he and Heechul don’t do that kind of thing anymore. Right now though, he really can’t think of anything. His head is kind of fuzzy from all the alcohol he’s been drinking.
“You are so drunk.” Heechul laughs and lets him go.
“Maybe I am.” Han Geng says sitting down hard on the floor. “Why am I here?”
Heechul shrugs and shoves Han Geng until he can rest his head comfortably on the other man’s lap. Geng leans against the wall, his head pulsing. He has a vague recollection of Siwon and Sungmin. There was something he was upset about. It was something with Zhou Mi too.
“You like him.” Heechul repeats. “If you didn’t like him then you wouldn’t have been so angry when you found out Sungmin spent the night at his house. You’re so bad at hiding what you feel. Anyone can read you. Also, never go off on Zhou Mi like that. It’s not his fault he didn’t know how much you want to get into Siwon’s pants.”
“That’s a lie.” Geng says. “I am not a book.”
“What are you talking about?” Heechul asks sitting up and taking Geng’s face in his hands. “Are you really that drunk?”
“You talk too fast.”
“You like him, don’t you?”
Han Geng sighs and pulls Heechul back down on his lap. “Maybe.”
---
Super Junior M is the best idea SM has ever had. Or so that’s what Han Geng thinks in the beginning. He is happy to the point of bursting when they tell him that he can go back to China. He’s made plans to see his mother, his father, some friends that he’s been missing. He has everything planned out, worked over and around his schedule. He can do it. He’ll make fifty copies of himself if he has to.
Of course, it doesn’t work out. There is planning to do. The other members don’t know how to communicate properly. Other than Zhou Mi who is the light in Han Geng’s dark world of stylists and news reporters, there is no one to help him. Geng is the leader, the man in charge. He has to run from one end to the other, making sure no one left anything.
He is driving himself insane, hungry, tired. He’s lost weight and he just really wants to fall over and sleep for days. There are too many things to do because the members can’t just talk for themselves here. Here, Han Geng is in charge.
“Hyung, you need to eat.” Siwon tells him just as he flashes past trying to get to the kitchen.
“I did eat Siwon.” Han Geng answers getting to the table in time to stop the plate from falling. “There was just no one to see me.”
Siwon shakes his head, that sad look on his face tugging at Geng’s heart. He’s too busy in China to notice the way Siwon is looking at him, eyes worried. He’s too busy to notice the way Siwon is particularly touchy here.
Han Geng doesn’t see it with all the running he is doing, the speaking, the smiling. He makes sure everyone is together, that Zhou Mi has Kyuhyun all safe and secure, that Henry and Ryeowook didn’t fall asleep in the car. He’s busy, all the time and so he doesn’t notice Siwon.
“You need a break.” Siwon tells him one day. “Tomorrow. I already asked our manager. You get tomorrow off to go and actually see China.”
Han Geng doesn’t know what to say. He has wanted to see China, to take time and be here. Just Han Geng. Not as the leader of SJM. Not as an artist, but as Han Geng. He wants to see China.
“Thank you.” He says.
Siwon smiles, opens his arms and holds him tight. “I love you hyung.”
And as Siwon pulls away to smile at him, Han Geng thinks that maybe coming to China isn’t a bad idea after all.
---
“So did you tell him yet?”
“Tell who what?” Han Geng murmurs into the phone.
“Tell Siwon and you know what.”
“Right, Siwon. Okay. Yeah. Um, what?”
“You have no clue who this is do you? Are you drunk?”
Oh, Han Geng thinks, Heechul.
“I am not drunk.” He says sitting up on the couch. “It’s just late. What are you doing up so late anyway? Don’t you have a schedule to go to tomorrow?”
“Yeah,” Heechul answers, “But this is more important than my schedule. I heard you and Siwon went out today. Alone.”
“We did.” Han Geng answers getting up and going to his room just as Siwon and the rest of the group comes in. “We did. So?”
“So?” Heechul shrieks. “You are an idiot. Why haven’t you told him? You do know that the only reason Sungmin hasn’t stripped Siwon naked and tied him to his bed, is because he believes in the whole hyung shit. Because if it were me, I wouldn’t give a damn if you were older than me.”
“Hang on.” Han Geng says working his head around the rapid Korean. “You need to slow down. I haven’t slept in weeks and it’s too late at night to do this to me. Sungmin is going to what?”
“He’s a kinky little bastard.” Heechul replies. “Anyway, if I were you I’d get a move on. You wouldn’t want Siwon to end up with Sungmin.”
“Right, okay. I got it. Go to sleep.”
“Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you when you walk in on Sungmin and Siwon.”
“Fuck you.”
“I love you too Hannie.”
Han Geng doesn’t sleep well that night even after he hangs up on Heechul. He’s never been the jealous type. Fuck, he didn’t even know he was capable of jealousy and over Siwon too. Sure, he’s admitted to maybe, maybe liking Siwon and it shouldn’t even count. He’d been drunk. His defenses were down. But, still it’s not nice.
---
Jealousy is not a good thing, Han Geng decides. It’s not even Zhou Mi’s fault. It’s Siwon’s fault. It’s Siwon’s fault because he’s the one who’s so touchy all the time.
No one says anything after Siwon practically buries himself in Zhou Mi’s hair. It’s like they all know what Han Geng is thinking and for a second Han Geng thinks that maybe Heechul’s right and everyone can read him like a book. It’s only after Kyuhyun almost breaks Zhou Mi’s arm dragging him away that Han Geng realizes Heechul isn’t always right.
Thank god.
“Hyung,” Siwon asks when the whole room goes silent, “Did I do something wrong?”
Han Geng makes sure to pinch Siwon extra hard as he walks by.
“Ow, what was that for?” Siwon calls.
“You had dirt on you.” Han Geng answers all wide eyed innocence.
His patience lasts him until they get back to the hotel. Siwon has the nerve to ask Donghae if they can share, as if Han Geng isn’t good enough.
“What happened to sharing with me?” Geng says just because, well, he was there first.
“Oh,” Siwon says, his face burning red, “I just thought that maybe you would want your room to yourself today.”
Han Geng wants to ask what kind of stupid person ever gave him that idea, but he can’t. It’s rude.
“If you don’t want to share with me Siwonnie, then you don’t have to.”
Siwon murmurs something, but Geng only catches the end. It’s probably all he’s been waiting to hear anyway.
“I’ll be right there.”
Han Geng smiles, says goodbye to Donghae who has him in a near bone crushing hug and goes upstairs. Siwon is already there.
“I thought you said I would have to wait for you.”
“I never said that.” Siwon says shifting from foot to foot.
“What’s wrong Siwon?” Han Geng asks.
He still has this sort of angry, but not really kind of feeling in the back of his head. Somehow, the image of Zhou Mi and Siwon doesn’t leave his head, no matter how hard he keeps picturing Kyuhyun with his death glare. Sure, Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun have a thing, but then he and Heechul had a thing before Siwon. Maybe it’s that kind of thing.
“Hyung, are you angry at me?” Siwon asks, looking up at Han Geng with those big, innocent eyes.
“No.” Geng sighs. “Of course not.”
Siwon opens his arms and Han Geng moves forward. Han Geng thinks, fuck it, somewhere between the circling of Siwon’s arms around him and the soft hair against his face.
“ShiYuan.” He whispers into Siwon’s ear. “ShiYuan, I don’t like it when you play with the others.”
He can feel the shiver that runs up Siwon’s spine even as he stiffens in Geng’s arms.
Too bad baby, he wants to say, You should have known better than to touch.
“ShiYuan.” Geng tries again.
He’s surprised by the way Siwon responds, that long drawn out moan resonating through Geng’s body. He’s sure there is something wrong when Siwon kisses him, lips dry but demanding. This time Geng really thinks fuck it. It being Siwon as he presses kiss after kiss along Siwon’s face and neck.
“Fuck.” Geng hisses when Siwon lands on top of him, fingers nimble, undoing the buttons on Geng’s shirt.
Han Geng spares a thought to how Siwon might have learned all of this, but then it’s out the window because Siwon’s mouth is on his and they’re rolling over so that Geng is on top. All in all Geng thinks they get things pretty right this being their first time and all.
Siwon is moaning under him as Geng works him open. It’s going to work the other way one day, but for now Geng just wants this. He likes watching Siwon calling him, begging for him. It should be kind of wrong, maybe a lot wrong, but right now it’s just hot what with Siwon panting, face red. Geng kind of likes this Siwon, those wide eyes looking at him, hips moving, whimpers falling from Siwon’s lips.
Of course after all the work is done and Geng is buried as deep as he can go there is a little matter to consider.
“Aren’t you scared?” Geng gasps as Siwon clenches around him. “Fuck.”
“Waited too long.” Siwon says rubbing Geng’s thigh. “Don’t like waiting.”
Han Geng laughs, gives an experimental thrust and chokes on his tongue. Siwon’s half scream doesn’t help his concentration.
“Okay. Well then, just…hang on.” Geng says as he tries again.
Siwon is loud. A lot louder than Han Geng anticipated. The noises that fall from those lips don’t seem right coming from Super Junior’s gentleman, but Geng is not one to complain. He won’t actually, not when Siwon arches his neck that way and Geng can bury his face in it, teeth grazing over the exposed skin.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Siwon groans, “god, fuck.”
“Bad boy ShiYuan.” Geng manages. “Do you need me to wash out your mouth with soap?”
“Fuck, I’ll let you wash it out with something else.” Siwon gasps. “If you let me next time.”
Han Geng chokes on air because he is sure Siwon did not just imply what he’s been wanting for a very long time. He recovers quickly because he’s just been made that way. Super Junior is relentless when they attack.
“We. Need. To. Try. That. Next. Time.” Geng says punctuating each word with a snap of his hips.
Siwon talks too much Han Geng decides as he shuts up Siwon’s next comment with a swipe of his tongue. Han Geng drowns out Siwon’s moans and cries with his mouth, swallowing each and every curse. They taste like chocolate, thick and warm and delicious. And when Siwon comes, nails digging into Han Geng’s hips, then it tastes like home and strawberries and Siwon.
---
“I love you, really.” Siwon says later.
Han Geng smiles, burying his face in Siwon’s shoulder so that his words are lost in Siwon’s warm skin.
“What did you say?” Siwon asks¸ fingers running through Han Geng’s hair.
Han Geng looks up. He makes a show of unburying his face from Siwon’s shoulder. “I said. Yeah, me too.”
Siwon smiles and Han Geng thinks that maybe jealousy isn’t so bad after all.
---
It becomes routine this thing with Siwon. Han Geng never thought it would be so easy, but it is. There is something beautiful and right about falling into Siwon’s hug. It’s like finding that safe place in all the noise. Siwon is Han Geng’s safe place.
And, maybe, he’s also Siwon’s.
I am supposed to be writing qmimin, but I was spammed with shihan so...this is not my fault. OTL i shall finish that qmimin soon I promise. In the meantime have some shihan.
Pairing: shihan and side qmi. also smugbestfriend!heechul because if there is no hanchul i didn't do my job.
Genre: romance, maybe angst idk
Rating: PG-13 (maybe R)
Summary: Han Geng likes Siwon. Heechul? Heechul is just there to make fun of him.
a/n: this is sort of a different style than what I am used to writing, but meh there's a first time for everything. enjoy.
Siwon shouldn’t have touched him. That’s what Han Geng thinks anyway. He knows that this is how things start, with small touches that give way to burning gazes and rough exchanges between sheets once everyone else is sleeping. Han Geng knows because he’s had that with Heechul. He knows that is can go wrong too. It can go very wrong, if you don’t know what you’re doing, if you’re not careful.
He and Heechul have always had a unique sort of relationship, one that needs no words because sometimes words are too much. Heechul is content with just teasing Han Geng, understanding him in a way that no one else seems to understand him. They’re special; two best friends who can fuck and not have it interfere with their relationship.
Siwon is different.
Han Geng knows Siwon is different because when he first meets Siwon it’s easy.
“nǐ hǎo ma.”
Han Geng doesn’t know what to do. The words are perfect. He’s missed them after being in Korea for so long. He’s so excited to have met someone who can speak his native tongue that he’s off rambling about the weather, the sun, the sky, dancing and the way Heechul can’t seem to keep quiet long enough once he gets in one of his moods.
Siwon looks at him with big eyes, hands moving in front of him, trying to stop him. But, Han Geng is at home for once and Siwon has to take both his hands before Han Geng stops talking.
“I’m sorry.” Siwon says, his smile sheepish. “I can’t understand when you talk so fast.”
“Oh,” Han Geng says. “I’m sorry. I thought…”
Han Geng is sure that Siwon notices his disappointment. It’s kind of hard not to, but Geng has learned to deal with disappointment. He’s in Korea. This is not China.
Still, the touching. Siwon really didn’t have to touch him. He could have just told Han Geng to stop. It’s not that Han Geng minds, not really. He’s used to touching, courtesy of Heechul, but Siwon is just so eager, so willing to please. Small touches are one thing, but Siwon doesn’t do small.
On stage, off stage, before a show, after a show, everywhere; that is what Siwon does. And it’s not just a small brush of arms either. Siwon loves hugs. And Han Geng isn’t too opposed to giving them. He’s lost count of the number of times he’s run into Siwon’s arms on stage.
It’s occurred to him that maybe it was all part of this thing called fan service, but then there are the touches no one sees. There are the times that Siwon has curled up on the couch, his head on Geng’s shoulder. There are the times that Siwon has held his hand as they watch TV. There are the times that the cameras aren’t rolling and Siwon will just turn to him, eyes bright, arms ready.
Han Geng has yet to deny Siwon anything. He can say no to Heechul, but he can’t seem to say no to Siwon. It’s too easy to fall into that spot that Siwon has reserved for him. Nice and comfortable. Perfect.
No, Han Geng thinks, Siwon really should have never touched him.
---
It’s too easy to fall into a set pattern with Siwon.
“Talk to me in Korean hyung.” Siwon says one evening. “I’ll talk to you in Chinese.”
Han Geng lets him, listens as Siwon lets the Chinese words slip from his mouth. It’s beautiful and easy and Han Geng wants to answer him, but they’re practicing and he has to answer in Korean. They talk that way for days, both over the phone and when Siwon comes over. It drives the others insane because mostly they just get to hear what Han Geng is saying and with his accent, it’s kind of hard to understand sometimes.
Han Geng does it on purpose. He doesn’t want them to know what he and Siwon are talking about. He wants those words coming out of Siwon’s mouth to be only for him. It doesn’t matter that those words are nothing more than simple “did you eat yet,” “are you hungry,” or “how is my Chinese hyung.” They mean so much more to Han Geng.
He thinks it’s because Siwon is the first person to touch him in that way. Siwon is the first one to understand just how hard it is for him to be here. Siwon gets it because Siwon went to China with him that one time. Siwon came over to his room at night and sat with him. Siwon cried into Han Geng’s arms because he was homesick.
So, Siwon understands. Siwon gets it more than anyone else does and Han Geng thinks that’s why it’s so easy to fall into routine. It’s easy because Siwon has told him.
”I will protect you hyung. Just come to me. I will take care of you.”
Words like those aren’t easy to forget. Han Geng has them engraved in his head and that’s why he doesn’t want the others to know what he and Siwon talk about. He is just making sure that if Siwon ever says them again, it’ll be just between the two of them.
It’s just because Siwon gets him in a different way.
That’s all.
---
It’s Heechul’s fault Han Geng ends up with a cruel dose of reality. He thinks that he may need to get a better friend, but then, Heechul isn’t a bad friend. No, Heechul is just a bit cruel. Or maybe Han Geng just thinks that reality is cruel and finds it easier to blame Heechul.
He’ll go with the last one. He might have to revise later, but seeing as how Heechul has him pinned to the wall, it’s kind of hard to process thoughts.
“You like him you idiot.” Heechul says.
“Aren’t you supposed to be the one against the wall?” Han Geng asks.
Somewhere in the back of his mind it registers that he and Heechul don’t do that kind of thing anymore. Right now though, he really can’t think of anything. His head is kind of fuzzy from all the alcohol he’s been drinking.
“You are so drunk.” Heechul laughs and lets him go.
“Maybe I am.” Han Geng says sitting down hard on the floor. “Why am I here?”
Heechul shrugs and shoves Han Geng until he can rest his head comfortably on the other man’s lap. Geng leans against the wall, his head pulsing. He has a vague recollection of Siwon and Sungmin. There was something he was upset about. It was something with Zhou Mi too.
“You like him.” Heechul repeats. “If you didn’t like him then you wouldn’t have been so angry when you found out Sungmin spent the night at his house. You’re so bad at hiding what you feel. Anyone can read you. Also, never go off on Zhou Mi like that. It’s not his fault he didn’t know how much you want to get into Siwon’s pants.”
“That’s a lie.” Geng says. “I am not a book.”
“What are you talking about?” Heechul asks sitting up and taking Geng’s face in his hands. “Are you really that drunk?”
“You talk too fast.”
“You like him, don’t you?”
Han Geng sighs and pulls Heechul back down on his lap. “Maybe.”
---
Super Junior M is the best idea SM has ever had. Or so that’s what Han Geng thinks in the beginning. He is happy to the point of bursting when they tell him that he can go back to China. He’s made plans to see his mother, his father, some friends that he’s been missing. He has everything planned out, worked over and around his schedule. He can do it. He’ll make fifty copies of himself if he has to.
Of course, it doesn’t work out. There is planning to do. The other members don’t know how to communicate properly. Other than Zhou Mi who is the light in Han Geng’s dark world of stylists and news reporters, there is no one to help him. Geng is the leader, the man in charge. He has to run from one end to the other, making sure no one left anything.
He is driving himself insane, hungry, tired. He’s lost weight and he just really wants to fall over and sleep for days. There are too many things to do because the members can’t just talk for themselves here. Here, Han Geng is in charge.
“Hyung, you need to eat.” Siwon tells him just as he flashes past trying to get to the kitchen.
“I did eat Siwon.” Han Geng answers getting to the table in time to stop the plate from falling. “There was just no one to see me.”
Siwon shakes his head, that sad look on his face tugging at Geng’s heart. He’s too busy in China to notice the way Siwon is looking at him, eyes worried. He’s too busy to notice the way Siwon is particularly touchy here.
Han Geng doesn’t see it with all the running he is doing, the speaking, the smiling. He makes sure everyone is together, that Zhou Mi has Kyuhyun all safe and secure, that Henry and Ryeowook didn’t fall asleep in the car. He’s busy, all the time and so he doesn’t notice Siwon.
“You need a break.” Siwon tells him one day. “Tomorrow. I already asked our manager. You get tomorrow off to go and actually see China.”
Han Geng doesn’t know what to say. He has wanted to see China, to take time and be here. Just Han Geng. Not as the leader of SJM. Not as an artist, but as Han Geng. He wants to see China.
“Thank you.” He says.
Siwon smiles, opens his arms and holds him tight. “I love you hyung.”
And as Siwon pulls away to smile at him, Han Geng thinks that maybe coming to China isn’t a bad idea after all.
---
“So did you tell him yet?”
“Tell who what?” Han Geng murmurs into the phone.
“Tell Siwon and you know what.”
“Right, Siwon. Okay. Yeah. Um, what?”
“You have no clue who this is do you? Are you drunk?”
Oh, Han Geng thinks, Heechul.
“I am not drunk.” He says sitting up on the couch. “It’s just late. What are you doing up so late anyway? Don’t you have a schedule to go to tomorrow?”
“Yeah,” Heechul answers, “But this is more important than my schedule. I heard you and Siwon went out today. Alone.”
“We did.” Han Geng answers getting up and going to his room just as Siwon and the rest of the group comes in. “We did. So?”
“So?” Heechul shrieks. “You are an idiot. Why haven’t you told him? You do know that the only reason Sungmin hasn’t stripped Siwon naked and tied him to his bed, is because he believes in the whole hyung shit. Because if it were me, I wouldn’t give a damn if you were older than me.”
“Hang on.” Han Geng says working his head around the rapid Korean. “You need to slow down. I haven’t slept in weeks and it’s too late at night to do this to me. Sungmin is going to what?”
“He’s a kinky little bastard.” Heechul replies. “Anyway, if I were you I’d get a move on. You wouldn’t want Siwon to end up with Sungmin.”
“Right, okay. I got it. Go to sleep.”
“Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you when you walk in on Sungmin and Siwon.”
“Fuck you.”
“I love you too Hannie.”
Han Geng doesn’t sleep well that night even after he hangs up on Heechul. He’s never been the jealous type. Fuck, he didn’t even know he was capable of jealousy and over Siwon too. Sure, he’s admitted to maybe, maybe liking Siwon and it shouldn’t even count. He’d been drunk. His defenses were down. But, still it’s not nice.
---
Jealousy is not a good thing, Han Geng decides. It’s not even Zhou Mi’s fault. It’s Siwon’s fault. It’s Siwon’s fault because he’s the one who’s so touchy all the time.
No one says anything after Siwon practically buries himself in Zhou Mi’s hair. It’s like they all know what Han Geng is thinking and for a second Han Geng thinks that maybe Heechul’s right and everyone can read him like a book. It’s only after Kyuhyun almost breaks Zhou Mi’s arm dragging him away that Han Geng realizes Heechul isn’t always right.
Thank god.
“Hyung,” Siwon asks when the whole room goes silent, “Did I do something wrong?”
Han Geng makes sure to pinch Siwon extra hard as he walks by.
“Ow, what was that for?” Siwon calls.
“You had dirt on you.” Han Geng answers all wide eyed innocence.
His patience lasts him until they get back to the hotel. Siwon has the nerve to ask Donghae if they can share, as if Han Geng isn’t good enough.
“What happened to sharing with me?” Geng says just because, well, he was there first.
“Oh,” Siwon says, his face burning red, “I just thought that maybe you would want your room to yourself today.”
Han Geng wants to ask what kind of stupid person ever gave him that idea, but he can’t. It’s rude.
“If you don’t want to share with me Siwonnie, then you don’t have to.”
Siwon murmurs something, but Geng only catches the end. It’s probably all he’s been waiting to hear anyway.
“I’ll be right there.”
Han Geng smiles, says goodbye to Donghae who has him in a near bone crushing hug and goes upstairs. Siwon is already there.
“I thought you said I would have to wait for you.”
“I never said that.” Siwon says shifting from foot to foot.
“What’s wrong Siwon?” Han Geng asks.
He still has this sort of angry, but not really kind of feeling in the back of his head. Somehow, the image of Zhou Mi and Siwon doesn’t leave his head, no matter how hard he keeps picturing Kyuhyun with his death glare. Sure, Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun have a thing, but then he and Heechul had a thing before Siwon. Maybe it’s that kind of thing.
“Hyung, are you angry at me?” Siwon asks, looking up at Han Geng with those big, innocent eyes.
“No.” Geng sighs. “Of course not.”
Siwon opens his arms and Han Geng moves forward. Han Geng thinks, fuck it, somewhere between the circling of Siwon’s arms around him and the soft hair against his face.
“ShiYuan.” He whispers into Siwon’s ear. “ShiYuan, I don’t like it when you play with the others.”
He can feel the shiver that runs up Siwon’s spine even as he stiffens in Geng’s arms.
Too bad baby, he wants to say, You should have known better than to touch.
“ShiYuan.” Geng tries again.
He’s surprised by the way Siwon responds, that long drawn out moan resonating through Geng’s body. He’s sure there is something wrong when Siwon kisses him, lips dry but demanding. This time Geng really thinks fuck it. It being Siwon as he presses kiss after kiss along Siwon’s face and neck.
“Fuck.” Geng hisses when Siwon lands on top of him, fingers nimble, undoing the buttons on Geng’s shirt.
Han Geng spares a thought to how Siwon might have learned all of this, but then it’s out the window because Siwon’s mouth is on his and they’re rolling over so that Geng is on top. All in all Geng thinks they get things pretty right this being their first time and all.
Siwon is moaning under him as Geng works him open. It’s going to work the other way one day, but for now Geng just wants this. He likes watching Siwon calling him, begging for him. It should be kind of wrong, maybe a lot wrong, but right now it’s just hot what with Siwon panting, face red. Geng kind of likes this Siwon, those wide eyes looking at him, hips moving, whimpers falling from Siwon’s lips.
Of course after all the work is done and Geng is buried as deep as he can go there is a little matter to consider.
“Aren’t you scared?” Geng gasps as Siwon clenches around him. “Fuck.”
“Waited too long.” Siwon says rubbing Geng’s thigh. “Don’t like waiting.”
Han Geng laughs, gives an experimental thrust and chokes on his tongue. Siwon’s half scream doesn’t help his concentration.
“Okay. Well then, just…hang on.” Geng says as he tries again.
Siwon is loud. A lot louder than Han Geng anticipated. The noises that fall from those lips don’t seem right coming from Super Junior’s gentleman, but Geng is not one to complain. He won’t actually, not when Siwon arches his neck that way and Geng can bury his face in it, teeth grazing over the exposed skin.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Siwon groans, “god, fuck.”
“Bad boy ShiYuan.” Geng manages. “Do you need me to wash out your mouth with soap?”
“Fuck, I’ll let you wash it out with something else.” Siwon gasps. “If you let me next time.”
Han Geng chokes on air because he is sure Siwon did not just imply what he’s been wanting for a very long time. He recovers quickly because he’s just been made that way. Super Junior is relentless when they attack.
“We. Need. To. Try. That. Next. Time.” Geng says punctuating each word with a snap of his hips.
Siwon talks too much Han Geng decides as he shuts up Siwon’s next comment with a swipe of his tongue. Han Geng drowns out Siwon’s moans and cries with his mouth, swallowing each and every curse. They taste like chocolate, thick and warm and delicious. And when Siwon comes, nails digging into Han Geng’s hips, then it tastes like home and strawberries and Siwon.
---
“I love you, really.” Siwon says later.
Han Geng smiles, burying his face in Siwon’s shoulder so that his words are lost in Siwon’s warm skin.
“What did you say?” Siwon asks¸ fingers running through Han Geng’s hair.
Han Geng looks up. He makes a show of unburying his face from Siwon’s shoulder. “I said. Yeah, me too.”
Siwon smiles and Han Geng thinks that maybe jealousy isn’t so bad after all.
---
It becomes routine this thing with Siwon. Han Geng never thought it would be so easy, but it is. There is something beautiful and right about falling into Siwon’s hug. It’s like finding that safe place in all the noise. Siwon is Han Geng’s safe place.
And, maybe, he’s also Siwon’s.
I am supposed to be writing qmimin, but I was spammed with shihan so...this is not my fault. OTL i shall finish that qmimin soon I promise. In the meantime have some shihan.